EYE CANDY is so pretty and eye candy-ish and I’ve read a lot of eye candy that seriously let me down. No joke, they come into the military school and are so charming and pretty and overrule all the commanders and then overthrow everything and become traitors after climbing the ranks. How evil of them, no?
And because I am a sneaky spy like the Wraith, I managed to take this things captive and give them a VERY bad rating. What a severe punishment. I am no druskelle and no Grisha but I have collected records of these traitors therefore I bring them to you now. But this is confidential, and I am letting you in on it because you could be the future Wraith. But I am the Wraith right now. And if you run off with these, the Wraith will come after you. ( 😛 )
Top Five Wednesday is a weekly meme done up by a Booktuber Gingerreadslainey. Her booktube is mega-cool and I think you might want to join the Goodreads Group if you want more information, but you pretty much list your top five for the prompt given which will be posted in the T5W Goodreads Group, so obviously, this rocket is all set to take off.
1. Deep Blue
This book is so pretty! I mean the cover, honestly. It looks so dazzling. Does it not? The various green and blue palette of colors used goes well together and the emphasis on her hair, and her dress, flowing like the wind under the water, and the burning palace at the bottom–it all flows together very well, and the light from the top refracting in visible rays is just so perfect. AND HER TAIL HER FREAKING TAIL IS SO PRETTY.
But the book was sluggish and it was only the last 30 or 40 pages was the only good part and all the distracting sea slang was so confusing. I mean, I’m all up for changing up words to make it more interesting like girlfriend to merlfriend but there was so much of it, I couldn’t even tell what the heck was what and what was going on. And it’s supposed to be YA? It seems like MG. No cussing, no actual romance, no point of the story.
Um no. The cover is beautiful. And I also loved the little subtitle on the cover at the top if you can see it: The jungle hides a girl who cannot die. The plot should have seemed interesting, right? Creepy human-practically-manufacturing science associations and immortals. Oh, just you wait.
The bright green and the pastel green and the lilac flower and the white silhouette of a body against that and the title in that sharp-edged font and the orange author’s name–it all looks like one heck of a jungle palette, and all the colors look absolutely harmonious with each other, like they are singing a melody.
But this book did not sing a melody. It was incredibly long and it spanned over 4 days and half of what went on seemed like a bunch of unnecessary fluff and it was not at all appreciated and was not constructive to the story. It only dragged it on and made it seem pointless.
So I nag about this book enough times. The cover is gorgeous–and island through a test tube and all you can see clearly is that. The cover designer was obviously very talented. But I read this book in the hopes that Khoury’s second novel would best her first, Origin, aforementioned, by atleast a little. I was so dreadfully wrong.
In all of my book reviewing and reading experience, I have never rated a book below a 3 star rating except this one. I gave it 2 stars. Maybe because I’m good at picking good books. But. Just don’t read this unless you want an awful read.
4. The Selection Series
THE COVERS ARE SO PRETTY I AM DYING INSIDE. I can practically FEEL my heart compressing every time I look at those gorgeous colors, and those gorgeous gowns. But, ladies, this was quite disastrous. It was definitely a traitor in the ranks of Eye Candy. The flawless, various gowns, and the bright color theme (the main character is America Singer, therefore the books are blue, red, and white for the USA, in case you couldn’t tell, and it’s very clever) was so wonderful to look at.
And then the story completely bombed everything up. The protagonist is pitiful, the love triangle is pathetic, and the side characters disappear and reappear and are looked on differently at different and there is never a constant side character. The only GOOD part of this is Prince Maxon because he was a dimensional character and very attractive. 😛
That’s my favorite picture of America Singer because apparently she’s got the brains in the looks and not in the head.
Lord, have I been mini-reviewing each eye candy traitor I discuss? Whoops. You must know that, sanctum fumat, I like to blabber on and on and on and on and I tried to be a verbal minimalist in this post, but look how that failed. I must have turned you deaf or dumb or figuratively speechless. Major whoops.
The cover of Graceling is the epitome of Medieval elegance, with the sword and the eye and the rough-textured parchment paper-like thingy in the background, but the story has zilch elegance.
There is a case of cruddy insta-and-at-the-same-time-anti-love which makes the story a big snoozefest and I didn’t know what was happening half the time.
The beginning was boring. And this cheesy, stupid “love” makes our supposedly unforgiving serial paid murderer of a protagonist reason to go gallumphing to places nowhere in relativity to her character or what should have been her job and purpose. And this awful love story goes directly to bedding between the two characters and I see no reason the book should have ever went the way it did.
Because y’all are so lovely did I rant like that for forever. And besides, when eye candy turns traitor on the eye and the candy militaries, they’ll obviously hire the Wraith to save them all and magically become a druskelle and a Grisha and AHOSHIUHEDEGDYER all them evil traitors. So basically, these books have their rating on good hands in their appearance. Why you evil traitors. They must intend to provoke a dramatic response from me, or just leave me to shrivel up and die in need of a good book. But what they don’t know, you see, is I am super melodramatic 126% of the time.
Have you read any of these books? do you agree with my opinions on them? what were your disastrously perfect eye candy traitors? and have you read Six of Crows which is the best novel of ever? if you haven’t, you probably thought I’ve really gone and done it and turned loony this time: here’s another assurance I’m still the only mature and perfect not-out-of-a-Dr.-Seuss-book person.